5 – Fuck (me)

So yesterday I decided to weigh myself. BIG MISTAKE! I had gained weight and quite a lot. I was so shocked I don’t remember the exact number but it was a new highest weight. What the fuck? Why? I have been doing good and been going to the gym regularly and then I gain weight. What the hell am I supposed to do then? Argh fuck, it’s not fair!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today was not good. The weight gain made me lose my motivation. I should not have weighed myself. When will I learn?

Something good happened today though. There’s this guy I like quite a lot (not the guy from the other post. God, it’s hard to keep track on all these suitors!) but I don’t really know him and I’ve always assumed that he didn’t know I existed. My sister overheard him talking to his friend and he said that he thought I was really pretty. He also said I looked like Angelina Jolie which is completely off. I mean I’m blond, 5”5 and have zero sex-appeal and I’m not mysterious and confident but more boring and sweet. But it’s still nice! This guy is so nice. He’s really smart AND he’s an athlete (which actually could cause some problems because I don’t like feeling lazy/in bad shape but who am I kidding, it probably won’t be relevant like ever!). Also he doesn’t really know how to talk to girls which is weird because he’s pretty hot I’d say. But that just makes him even cuter. This made my day a little less crappy. Actually very less crappy (Can you say that?)(I’m such a silly girl whose self-esteem is determined by guy’s opinions. Damn it. I really wish it wasn’t so.)    

Why you looking like me bitch? (daaaaaamn, how can you be so fucking hot?)