I'm so sorry

I don’t love you. I don’t think I’m in love with you. I’m not sure I ever was.

I like you liking me.

And I’ve got an awful feeling that you feel the same way.

I wish you would hurt me. I need an excuse for climbing back in my black hole.  

Girls! I’m so sorry I haven’t been around. I should be happy. I’ve made friends and gotten good grades, but lately I’ve been feeling.. well I don’t know. I just have this recurrent thought that something is wrong.  

I have a boyfriend.

I always imagined that I would be in this dramatic relationship. We would both be madly in love and we should share all our secrets. I should be feeling complete. It’s not like that. It’s more cozy. I don’t know if it’s enough for me.

I keep thinking he could find someone better than me. Someone funnier, someone smarter, someone thinner.

I need to lose weight. Help me!

I really hope you’re doing well. Not necessarily losing weight, but I hope life is good to you. Hopefully I’ll be more around.